Seeds of Revival & the Hurts of Jesus

I would like to say this past week has been a good one, it wasn't but in some sense it was. Sunday started off good. I got my usual time with the Father in word and prayer before the house awoke with the business of breakfast & showers before church. Sunday service praise and worship were awesome, I believe we did touch God's heart and made Him blush. Pastor's message was a good one about stinky people and how church is to respond to them. I got some prayer after service for strength to get through all the negative stuff at work. Everything was fine until......until I lost my temper with someone I hold dear to my heart, then everything went down hill from there. I had spent 3 days in tears and prayer, battling the nasty spirits of offense and pride. If you are wondering if I won....well the battle belongs to the Lord and my part was just to submit to His authority and let Him do the work within me.

I haven't read much this past week, it has been mostly prayer and seeking the Lord within prayer. To me prayer isn't speaking flowery words spoken to impress God or others; prayer to me is communicating with the Lord....speaking honestly what is in my heart and then the silent wait and the listening for when He speaks. So I hadn't read much of my devotionals....oh I kept up somewhat with the Daily Bread, but Oswald Chamber's & Mr. Evan's laid on the desk untouched until this morning. It was W. Glyn Evan's devotional book that spoke volumes to me this morning when I played "catch up" on what I didn't read this week. Two days' devotionals spoke the most....Seeds of Revival & The Hurts of Jesus.

Seeds of Revival showed me what had happened this past week. Before you poo poo me, hang on and let me explain. Revival isn't the one week out of the year to have feel good services....true revival according to W. Glyn Evan's is "anything but pleasant, it is a searching, searing time when God's holiness burns hotly against our sins. It is know that God is a consuming fire (Hebrews 12:29), knowing God's terror (2 Corinthians 5:11), and crying out "woe is me" (Isaiah 6:5)."

Mr. Evans goes on to explain "Revival has one chief aim--the removal of sin and the purifying of the believer. The message of revival is: What are you doing about your piled up sins? Revival is a sign that, because of His thinning patience, God has moved His people to confession. But it also means something else. God loves us so much that He is anxious to put us back int a right relationship with Himself. The seed of revival is the grief of the Holy Spirit; the confession of the people is the Spirit's grief vented. Only when the Spirit is "ungrieved" can blessing come"

Basically boiled down this past week is answer to prayer...some of it immediate answer which I need to learn to look for. I have prayed that God search my heart and transform me into Jesus' bride. God is reviving me in the true sense of the word. God is searching and searing, purifying me from sins of the flesh & world. Some where I grew dull hearing His voice...so He is shaking everything that can be shaken within me to get me to a new place, a new level of intimacy and hearing. Somewhere I gave place to anger and bitterness. The Spirit part of me wants to get there and quickly, but the fleshly part of me is trying to fight....so I am nailing my feet once again to His cross, I am nailing one hand and then handing the hammer to Him to nail the other. If you have a few moments free, please pray for me, I can use all the prayer I can get these days.

The Hurts of Jesus is another devotional from Mr. Evans. "Only human beings can become morally & spiritually better because of their pain. Unless I suffer grief, I am not likely to grow into a mature disciple of Christ. One of the greatest disappointments You can suffer, Lord, is to see me battle my griefs and yet not become better." Mr. Evans goes on to say "Jesus wounded Simon Peter with a look that drove him to tears, he wept bitterly (Luke 22:62). To be hurt by Jesus is the most exquisite hurt conceivable. The hurts of Jesus, if I accept them properly are the healings of tomorrow. I need His hurting to cauterize the shallow and superficial in my life."

The definition of disciple is a disciplined follower. I can honestly say I have been hurt by Jesus this week. I have been humiliated and humbled....no I won't go into details because to do so would be gossip. But I will say I surrendered. I keep surrendering to the Holy Spirit and what He is accomplishing in me and soon through me. I have been reaching out to my Lord, seeking to be a true disciple. Now I am being disciplined to follow. When one thinks of discipline their minds immediately recall a time when Mom or Dad spanked them. True discipline is focused on the child; about correcting & directly the child in the way he/she should go. So even though I got a "God spanking" this week, I know His focus is on me...on correcting my walk & relationship with Him...a course correction if you will for this journey.

One last thought...be careful what you ask for....you will eventually get it! Make sure you are ready to receive what you ask of God. His word promises that if you ask for bread He won't give you a stone, but give you exactly what you are asking for. Sometimes it will come by surprise upon you, but it always comes in His perfect timing. It won't ever look like what you imagined either, but will be orchestrated by His perfect design.